Thursday, June 26, 2008

From the mouths of babes....

We spend the first few years of our children's lives trying to get them to talk...and then we spend the rest of our lives trying to keep them from saying something stupid. It's always an interesting time when your child learns new words and phrases, especially when those new words and phrases are of the "colorful" the other day.

Seth and I were at mom and dad's cabin when Seth noticed that the place was full of wasps. He ran outside to where we were and asked GMA to come and kill the wasp and that she should hurry because the wasp "looks pissed". Yup, pissed. As if that isn't enough, he has also begun to speak in "chat". When he asked me for an apple I said "what's the magic word?" and I was answered with the letters P-L-Z. Good grief, my son is an official Sign-o-the times. I guess I'm going to have to put my foot down....PDQ.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

I'm officially a weirdo... least according to my son I'm sure. It all started with a trip to the doctor today in which the good doc discovered (by some poking and prodding) that my son was constipated. I was given a prescription for a laxative and orders to give it to him until "nature took it's course". The only way to be sure, since I don't normally escort my son to the bathroom anymore, is to ask. I called him aside and told him that I "need to know when you poo"...and the look I received back was priceless. This dazed and confused look was followed with a timid "why?", to which I could only explain what the laxative was for...and of course my words were wasted on a seven year old.

So now here I sit, a strange old man in my son's eyes...with a strange fascination about his bowel movements and a two year supply of mystery powder that gets served in apple juice.

The joys of parenthood...asking questions of your own children that would get you thrown in jail if it were someones kid other than your own.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008


Well, for me anyways. It's a rare moment when Seth and Grandma are both gone at the same time and I have the house to myself. It's a time to reflect, consider my options and SWEEP UP ALL THE SKIN MY KID HAS SHED ALL OVER MY DESK!! This last week, he has managed to shed his sunburn on my desk, in my keyboard, in my mouse and in my chair. It' has been like living with a lizard that needs hand cream.

But enough about that, let's move on to school.

Some of you know that I'm currently taking some summer classes online and I may as well say that I'm loving one class and hating the other. The strange thing is....I'm hating the class that doesn't have a homework schedule and gives me six months to finish. This is no good for a professional procrastinator...I can just see it now...five months go by and I have to cram thirty assignments into a four week period. I'm doomed.

There are just too many things to do here besides homework now that the high waters have long as dad doesn't find me and use me for free labor to repair the cabin that was flooded a couple of days ago.

Shhhh....I won't tell if you don't

Sunday, June 15, 2008

I know, I know...

....he had time to redo his site but not to put a new post up.....yeah, with it.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Hell and High Water...

It's been an interesting couple of days here in the valley....and the name of the post says it all. The first indicator of how the week was going to go was picking my son up from his moms and discovering that he had been swimming all week without any sunblock. I now have a whimpering, quivering mass of tears wandering half naked around the house until the sunburn subsides. No amount of lotions, sprays, cool baths or daddy kisses is helping. The same day that I picked up Seth, the news reports began about flooding north of us in the Indianapolis area. This was a concern for us in the fact that Indianapolis is the watershed for the river down here. The next day, reports began rushing in that crews were reinforcing levees and bridges were beginning to collapse. The devastation can be followed on a direct line from the Indy area to here, the water is coming and there was no escape. To top off everything, Grandma (yes I said Grandma) decides to drive home from Nancy's house this morning and has a wreck in Spencer. No injuries except the car, but here is the point...she drove against the wishes of everyone involved because there is absolutely no route open from Nancy's house to here...everything is either under water or has the bridge collapsed. Yet the ornery old gal did it anyway.

Welcome to my world..a world of the strange, contrive and the just plain wrong.